We all make mistakes but it doesn’t mean we give ourselves permission to wallow in every reckless decision we’ve ever made in our lives. We can’t undo the past and we can’t go back and make things work but we can choose to start anew any day we want to rectify our wrongs. The problem with most of us is we can’t move forward because we’re unknowingly doing bad things and bad choices to ourselves. These things are the reasons that are holding us back from achieving ultimate happiness and self-fulfillment.
Here are some of the things you should stop doing to yourself so you can be happy and move on from your depressing past.
Stop wasting your time on the wrong people
Life is short to spend it on people who love to spread unhappiness to those around them. If you have friends who make fun of you, friends who don’t appreciate your worth and friends who don’t value you then those are not your real friends and you can do so much better. With millions of people in this world you are bound to find friends who are sincerely there for you, who cheer you on during your successes and who encourage you when you’re down. These are the people who make life worth living. If you find them, treasure them. Friendship isn’t about the number of years you’ve known each other; it’s about seeing that person for who he or she really is regardless if you’ve known them for 8 years or 8 months. What matters is how that person makes you feel. If you feel happy and inspired then surround yourself with those kinds of people. And slowly tick off those so-called friends who do nothing but infect you with bad vibes.
Stop evading your problems.
Here’s something worth pondering on, your problems won’t disappear after a night out with your friends and it won’t get better the morning after. It’s not going to be easy but it’s going to be worth it if you face your problems head on. Life isn’t perfect and because we live in an imperfect world we can’t escape problems. The beautiful thing about it though is there isn’t a problem we can’t solve. If you focus on your problem and concentrate on finding means to solve it, eventually you’ll come up with a solution and all the heartaches will go away. You will feel pain and you will stumble but in the end you’ll come out braver, smarter and happier and that’s the beauty of it.
Stop pretending to be someone you are not.
Everyone is different and you have to keep this in mind. If you think pretending to be someone you are not will make you happier because you assume that people will likely love and accept you for it, then you are only fooling yourself. Yes, the people around you may actually be impressed but it takes effort and a lot of energy to keep on pretending. Why don’t you just be yourself so you can see who your real friends are? The more honest you are with yourself the happier you’ll be. What matters is how you feel and not what others feel about you. If you love listening to One Direction go ahead and broadcast it on Spotify. If you’ve always been a fan of the Kardashians don’t be afraid to say it. The worst thing that could happen when you’re being yourself is you get judged, but hey, that’s what most people do? Right? What difference would it make? Focus on you.
Stop dwelling on the past.
The past is in the past for a reason. If you keep bringing the past up you can never move on. If you failed in Algebra accept it and move on. Study harder so that the next time you encounter that subject you’ll pass with flying colors. If your ex -boyfriend cheated on you, give yourself time to grieve and then afterwards accept that some people aren’t meant to be in your life and move on. The only way for you to move on is if you forgive yourself and those who have hurt you, accept the situation as it is and let go of all the pain, the bitterness and the hurt. Once you’ve done these you’re on your way to full recovery.
Stop closing your doors for new relationships just because the old one didn’t work out.
If you’ve learned to embrace singlehood and if you can picture yourself alone for the rest of your life then it’s okay you don’t entertain suitors. But if the reason why you don’t is because you’re scared that you’ll get hurt again, trust me, you’ll be living a life full of regrets. Don’t be afraid to give love another chance. If you think that person has the potential to make you happy go ahead and give it a shot. The only way to find out if he’s the right person for you is if you give it a go. Each person is different and your ex is not the same guy you’re dating if your gut tells you he’s wrong move on to the next until you find that spark.
Everyone deserves to be happy and that includes you. So for once, stop doing these to yourself so you can achieve happiness.